My Anniversary of Motherhood

Excitement is building, presents are hidden, parties are planned, and the bittersweet stress of elaborate cake construction is growing.

It is that special time of year when my first born celebrates his birthday.

Memories are bubbling to the surface too, I’m feeling nostalgic and misty-eyed at baby photos, reminiscing to myself of what pre-mother me was doing in the days before he arrived, before everything changed.

My Anniversary of Motherhood is coming around.

We have been his apprentices in an on-the-job training programme of parenthood. His firsts have been our firsts. We held our breath as he took his very first, and then it was headlong in to a flurry of firsts.

First feed, first night at home, first trying to get the rain cover on (epic fail, lots of swearing), first trip in the car, first day on our own, first poonami, first smile (amazing), first baby group (Wind the What Up?!), first teeth, first foods, first illness (terrifying), first words, first steps, first day at nursery and so many more. 

He has taken us through entire stages, from first nappy to last nappy, from sleeping beside me in our room to independent in a big boy bed, from pram to strutting along, he has led us on where he goes next. He has always reached for the next step without looking back, and I have marvelled at his progress, proud and amazed and sometimes a smidge sad that stage is over and wondering what the next one holds. Wondering what we will discover together next. Sometimes I worry that I haven’t appreciated it enough, that I haven’t documented and photographed enough, that he’s moving on already and I wasn’t ready yet.

But in the early weeks after he was born I met a lovely lady at a baby group who said to me with a smile that “it just gets better and better”. I will never forget the joy on her face or the hope and relief she gave me. Don’t get me wrong, we’ve had our moments, it’s not all #soblessed, but the lessons and the joys have layered up on top of each other to get us to where we are today. 

Each step he’s taken us on has brought us to this birthday, and he’s already talking excitedly about his next one and all the new things he will have achieved. I’m going to follow his lead on that, and look forward to more lessons and fun on the bumpy road of motherhood.

I might also have my own little party to celebrate my AoM with my labour playlist & baby photos, the prosecco is chilling ready!

Happy Birthday my amazing son, thank you for teaching us, we love you. x


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